[Index of all Weekly Divrei Torah pages]
From the long episode of Eliezer, servant of Abraham, who is sent on his way to find a wife for Abraham’s son Isaac, we learn that “the conversation of the servants of our forefathers is preferable to the Torah of their descendents [us].”
What happens is the following: Eliezer receives instructions to go to Abraham’s birthplace in order to search for a suitable wife for Isaac. When Eliezer asks (Gen 24:4-7), “what happens if the woman doesn’t want to go to Isaac? Should I then bring Isaac to her?” Abraham answers him, “Make sure that you don’t bring Isaac to her…G-d will send an angel before you in order to take her to my son from there.”
However, later in the parsha, when Eliezer has already encountered Rivka, given her gifts and wants to take her back to Abraham and Isaac, he recounts the same conversation with Abraham to Betuel (Rivka’s father). But, this time he changes one word, saying (Gen 24:40), “G-d…will sent an angel with you and make your path successfulŔ That is, Eliezer switches from “before you,” as Abraham really told him, to “with you,” when he recounted the story to Betuel. Now, it could be argued that this is an inconsequential variation, except for the fact the Rashi himself notes this exact variation earlier in the Torah, saying that it is significant. When the Torah said that G-d walked “with Noah” (beginning of parshat Noah), Rashi commented that G-d walked with Noah, but “before” Abraham, and describes the difference. Clearly, then, there is a significant variation between “before you” and “with you.”
The difference between them, though, is simple. If, as Eliezer described, the angel went “with” him, it meant that the angel accompanied him and helped him to accomplish his mission with success. If, however, the angel went “before” him, as Abraham said, it means that the angel preceded him on the path in order to guarantee the success of Eliezer’s mission. The difference is essential: if “with” Eliezer, then the efforts and success belonged to Eliezer. It’s just that the angel helped. However, if the angel went “before” Eliezer,” it means that the angel not only helped, but actually “prepared” the success in order to guarantee the accomplishment of the mission. In that case, the success of the mission was not dependent upon Eliezer. His presence was needed as a catalyst, a passive ingredient, but it wasn’t his effort that produced the results. The success was strictly from Above.
What we see in the verses is that the angel truly preceded Eliezer on his mission: as he arrived at the well, he did not even need to wait, and Rivka appeared (Gen 24:10-11, and 15). This was not a result of Eliezer’s prayer, since as the verse indicates, she appeared even before he concluded his prayer. That is, her arrival was pre-ordained from Above to coincide with Eliezer’s arrival to the well. And, after the negotiations for Rivka’s engagement progressed and her father, Betuel, began putting up resistance, he was promptly removed from the scene (the Midrash says and Rashi brings that the angel killed him). And finally, even though we don’t find that Eliezer ever spoke directly with Rivka about the match (he only gave her gifts and jewelry), she herself spoke up and said that she wished to travel immediately to meet and marry Isaac. This, even though the “normal” practice would have been to take time to think about the suggestion and then prepare for the wedding. It was not necessary for Eliezer to put any effort of his own into this shidduch (match). The presence of the angel “before” Eliezer prepared and guaranteed the success of his mission without him having to put any effort of his own into it.
Nevertheless, we find that Eliezer, when speaking to Betuel, said that the angel went “with” him rather than “before” him. However, this is understandable. If the point of the conversation with Betuel was to convince him to condone and agree to the match between Isaac and Rivka, then there was no point in telling Betuel that the match was pre-ordained. If it was “already happening” because the angel had gone “before” Isaac, then why try to convince Betuel – there was nothing to be gained by seeking his agreement. Therefore, Eliezer changed the language when speaking with Betuel, saying only that the angel was “with” him, helping him, but not that this was already a “done deal.” As it happened, Betuel resisted and was killed, but before that took place, Eliezer naturally wanted to convince him to support the match. He therefore refrained from telling him that the match was pre-ordained. He only told him that the angel was “with” him, leaving him room to exercise his own free choice.
But, Eliezer did hint to Betuel what was going on in this supernatural sequence of events. As he explained that Abraham said the angel would be “with” him, he added a few words that Abraham really didn’t say, “and make my path successful.” Similarly, as he prayed to G-d to find the right woman for Isaac, he used the word “success,” saying, “if it is Your will, pave my way with success” (24:42). True success is not the achievement that follows upon our effort from below. True success is that which G-d gives man as a gift from Above. This we see in many places in the Torah. For example, regarding Joseph, the Torah says that “G-d was with Joseph and he was a successful man…G-d brought him success…all that he did was successful” (Gen 39:2-3). It is in this sense that Eliezer also hinted to Betuel, “G-d is making my path successful.”
The above level of success surpasses the success that accompanies one’s efforts. It is true that “He who says he labored and succeeded is believed,” and his success may far outstrip his level of effort. Nevertheless it is still his efforts that bring about his success. True success, though, is unconnected to our efforts – it is truly a gift from Above. Thus, when Eliezer said to Betuel that the angel was “with him” and “making his path successful,” he was hinting to the level of success that comes from Above. He was trying to tell him that the angel was truly “before” him, preparing his path, and guaranteeing his success from Above. He only had to use the terminology, “with” him in order to preserve his free choice. And when Eliezer recounted how, even before he concluded his prayer, Rivka appeared, Betuel himself was forced to admit that the whole shidduch was not dependent upon him, but pre-ordained from Above.
And now we can also understand Abraham’s answer to Eliezer when he questioned Abraham about his mission. When Eliezer asked if the girl doesn’t want to go with him back to Isaac, should he bring Isaac to her, Abraham answered (paraphrase), “Absolutely not. An angel will go before you and bring a woman for my son from there.” This was all presuming that the girl would want to marry Isaac. But, at this stage, how was that to be known? Not having met Isaac, how could the girl be expected to agree to marry him? But, since Abraham knew that the mission was to take place by the accompaniment of an angel leading Eliezer, he knew that the mission was pre-arranged for success. He knew that the efforts of Eliezer were not the significant factor, and that true success was dependent upon a gift from Above, from HaShem, embodied in the angel that was proceeding “before” Eliezer. Thus, he had no problem in answering Eliezer that the angel would bring a woman back to be the wife of his son, even though he did not yet have the agreement of the girl herself.
And that may be why “the conversations of the servants of our forefathers is preferable to the Torah of their offspring.” In all that we do, including our service of the One Above, we have free choice. Whether we are learning Torah, doing mitzvoth or pursuing a livelihood, we make choices about how, what and why we are doing. Our forefather’s servants, though, were guided by angels. They didn’t have a choice in the matter. Their G-dly service was so high that its success was guaranteed by angels that went “before” them.
But, for that to occur, there are two pre-conditions:
1) We have to be ‘servants of the forefathers,’ and a servant has no self-existence; his existence is only for his ‘father.’
2) There has to be ‘conversation.’ Conversation’ is prayer, the supplication to the One Above by a Jew who knows that he is dependent upon his master, the Creator of the universe.
By means of total self-nullification and prayer, we make ourselves into ‘calim,’ or vessels so that He can send us angels, the kind that go before us and lead to true success!
Adopted from Likutei Sichot of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, ztz’l, vol.25, p. 99
Rabbi David Sterne, Jerusalem Connection in the old city of Jerusalem