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On this week’s Torah portion (Matot), the Ilana deChaya quotes the verse (Numbers 32:22), “And the land will be conquered before God, after which you may return, and you will be clear [of any obligation] to God and to the Jewish people, and this land will be yours as an inheritance before God.”
First, a little context – the Jewish people were camped on the east banks of the Jordan river, ready to cross and enter the land of Israel. Two tribes (Gad and Reuven and part of the tribe of Menashe) approached Moshe and requested to remain on the east side of the Jordan because they had a lot of cattle, and the land there was good for grazing cattle. Moshe became quite incensed at their apparent lack of desire to enter Israel, and censored them. He told them that this was exactly the same kind of behavior as the spies, who with their negative report, caused the Jews to spend forty extra years wandering in the desert. Duly contrite, the tribes of Reuven and Gad reported back to Moshe, volunteering to lead the battle of conquest of the land of Israel, and only afterward return to their present location to settle the land on the east bank of the Jordan. Moshe accepted their suggestion on condition that they go to battle in advance of the other ten tribes, and remain in battle until the entire land was conquered. Only then would the tribes of Gad and Reuven be permitted to return to the east bank of the Jordan and build their homes and cities.
And this is where our verse comes in and the Ilana deChaya begins to comment. In essence, he turns the verse “inside-out.” That is, he interprets it as events that are occurring inside of us, rather than “outside” in the land of Israel. So, here we go…
“And the land will be conqueredŔ – How do we conquer our internal lusts and earthiness? Ӆbefore GodŔ – by recalling that we stand before God, similar to the verse that states, ‘I place God constantly before me.’
“After whichŔ - the word ‘after’ (achar) also means ‘other,’ which alludes to the evil inclination within us. Ӆyou may returnŔ – that is, you may return [to your true self] and get rid of these lusts and inclinations… Ӆand you will be clear of any obligation [to God and the Jewish people]” – because when you are pure and innocent, you do not cause any kind of problems for the Jews or for G-d.
And then, Ӆthis land...” - The word “land” (aretz) alludes to God’s Will (ratzon), as in the saying of the sages, “Why is the land called aretz? Because it runs (ratz) to do the Will (ratzon) of the Creator.” Finally, Ӆyours as an inheritance before God” – that is, even if you are unable to reach this spiritual level, if you have a desire and will to do so, this is valuable in the eyes of God. [Just as the land becomes ours as an inheritance, and not because we earned it with our own accomplishments, so our yearning for a spiritual level is itself an achievement, and is accounted to us as if we actually accomplished it]. To illustrate this principle, consider one who is searching for a lost object. If it is a physical object, he will not be happy until he finds it. But if he is searching for a ‘lost’ spiritual level (i.e. a level that he has not yet attained), then upon entering the search, he is immediately happy to be involved in searching among the treasures of the King.
Thus, the next verse (32:23) reads, “And if you fail to do so, then you will have sinned against GodŔ That is, by failing to search for and reveal our true spiritual level, we commit the equivalent of a sin. Our failure leaves a stain upon our soul, which is a portion of Godliness. And moreover, we cause sorrow to the shechina (God’s presence on earth)…
From this commentary of the Ilana deChaya emerges an amazing concept. And that is – it is not sufficient to avoid Torah transgressions and to fulfill the mitzvoth of the Torah. If we are not actively involved in avodat HaShem – in meditating and praying to acquire higher spiritual levels – then we are sinning against our soul, which craves spiritual unity and elevation. Moreover, the spiritual search does not have to yield results – the very fact that we search and that we are involved in raising our own spiritual level is sufficient to cause both us and the One above much pleasure. That is an important thing to keep in mind during these three weeks before the fast of the 9th of Av. As the Shulchan Aruch (code of Jewish law) says, during this period, we must “minimize our happiness.” And as the Chasidim say, “yes, minimize, but do so in joy.” That is, while experiencing the loss and destruction of the Temple, we must also recognize the potential that we have for spiritual growth and actualization. And that, my friends, will speedily bring the meshiach and the building of the third and permanent Beit Hamikdash!